“My friends didn’t tell me that I…would become a drug addict for eight years, my friends didn’t tell me that!…My friends didn’t tell me that as I did drugs with my girlfriend, that my child would be born with severe birth defects, my friends didn’t tell me that! My friends didn’t tell me that I would end up…pulling the plug on my own child…my friends didn’t tell me that!” Choked voice, tears welling in his eyes, emphatic with memory, guilt-ridden with regret; that was Terry Douglas, that was the radical reality underneath the humorous, nonchalant, loving speaker that went from one side of the Pitman High School gym on a sunny Monday morning, on September 10, 2012.

The Radical Reality Assembly was on a short day. Typically, there were no high expectations of intensive high learning on a minimum day. However, Terry Douglas instant connection was felt and absorbed by everyone on impact; the expectation was raised higher than it had ever been raised on our campus. It was highly noticeable that Terry was a highly experienced speaker, a man with a lot of experience in life, a man with wisdom, a man with a captivating charisma unlike any other seen on campus. Through jokes, through laughs, through seriousness, through tears, Pitman was marked; the evidence was in the extreme respect, in the extreme applause constantly given to Terry. He opened himself to us, “I never loved life until I lost life” so we could open ourselves to him, to truth, to a better life/lifestyle.

Terry confessed having been manipulated by friends who did not honestly care about him at a young age, had tricked him into believing ideology that wasn’t his, had fallen victim to drugs and trafficking, had done the same unto others like his friends had done to him. The loss of his daughter Natasha after five days due to severe deformities caused by his addictions/actions made him realize that “there is a high price for low living”. Loosing life made him value life, made him realize the importance of self-respect and respect of others. The reality is this: acceptance, performance, and performance in life highlight your ultimate results. Life is “an emotional roller-coaster, and if you’re always at the mercy of others, you will be led into becoming something you are not, something you will regret. Yes, it is true that “when you don’t feel accepted, you feel like you live on Loser Street, address zero.” Still, that should not be the reason why you should break your image instead of make your image. Terry stressed to us that real friendship consisted of those who brag about our strengths and support us through our weaknesses; “You can’t soar with the eagles when you’re down with the turkeys!”

There is a difference between being accepted and being used. Self-respect and respect for others is vital. This wasn’t a discouraging note for those lost. On the contrary, Terry was stressing this simple fact of life: “A hard fall is a high bounce if you are made of the right material…” The design of your life is essentially in your hands.

Disrespect is at an intense high now days; that’s the problem. Appreciation no longer exists at the stage of disrespect. Privileges are taken for granted, and often many fail to note that the value with which people see you with will derive directly from how much you respect your own self! Terry gave advice to girls and boys alike, knowing the reality of our young life. Girls, respect yourselves and don’t be with someone or have sexual relations with a that person simply to be accepted. Don’t put your dreams on the line, it will never be worth it, and you know it. Guys, be real men! Watch your language and manners around women, watch for your future! Anyone can contribute to the birth of a child, but it is real men that are careful, think, and don’t leave their kids to the government’s sake…

“I didn’t come to scare you straight, but to tell you the truth straight: Respect yourself, respect others and watch how it’ll affect yours and other’s futures!” If someone would have come up to you some time before and said that on that Monday, a minimum day, you were going to receive some of the biggest lessons of your life through the eyes of someone else, you probably wouldn’t have given it much thought…Terry changed that, changed many on campus that learned from reality that day, that radical reality that exists in the world.